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If DC Does End Up Getting That House Seat, Roland Burris Does Have Another Open Spot On The Ole Mausoleum, Now That You Mention It

  • Well, that’s that: The only places you can now smoke in Virgina are on private property, in the outdoors, and in sin. [DC Examiner]
  • Looks like local fat-cat public school consiglieres are taking exotic, boozy Grand Tours instead of administering education. [Washington Post]
  • DC might get its precious seat in the House after all, as no one can afford to hire a lawyer to try to stop it from happening. [DCist]
  • Make your own Wire reference! Here are your KEYWORDS: 41 kilograms, Police Commissioner Frederick H. Bealefeld III, “a wholesale operation”, cash, Baltimore. Have fun/no cheating. [WTOP]
  • Find out where famous DC journalists like Luke Russert, MSNBC’s Youth Culinary Attache, like to eat and pretend to care about Restaurant Week. [Fishbowl DC]


3:29 PM on Fri February 20 2009
By Juli Weiner
1996 Views

  1. wreckingball says at 3:43 pm, February 20th, 2009

    Pat Quinn has apparently come up with an assignment for Burris to coax him down from his Ivory Tower - way down…

    http://tinyurl.com/dd2g2u

  2. SayItWithWookies says at 3:44 pm, February 20th, 2009

    Plant your tomacco now, kids!

  3. “Police Commissioner Frederick H. Bealefeld III’s weight was down to a mere 41 kilograms after a new cleansing procedure at Joe’s House of Colon in Baltimore. While not currently covered by any medical insurance, Joe manages to keep his fees affordable by running it as ‘a wholesale operation,’ cash only.”

    Close enough?

  4. nmmagayar says at 4:02 pm, February 20th, 2009

    by “$11,000.00″ there was actually $110,000.00, right?

  5. Lionel Hutz Esq. says at 4:08 pm, February 20th, 2009

    Wait, I can carry a concealed weapon into church in most of the South, but I can’t smoke in church in Virginia? Why do the libtards hate our freedom so much?

  6. WHERE DA FRIDAY NOONAN/!?1///???!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111111

  7. snideinplainsight says at 4:27 pm, February 20th, 2009

    Hey, what’s the difference between Latvia and Iceland? 5 letters and 6 months!

    Now that’s funny! I’ve been trying to do that all week! Haw!

  8. So if I get have a $4000/hr hooker sent from NY to a certain hotel room, am I allowed to have a smoke afterwards, or would I be breaking the law?

  9. Wait, you’re getting it all wrong. The Trailblazer’s career path is clear and well defined, like all trailblazers.

    1) Misc. trailblazing jobs such as being black and a non-CPA on an accounting regulatory body (= quality regulation)
    2) Qestionably appointed Illinois Senator
    3) POTUS
    4) ????
    5) Profit (for the Blagger)

  10. skyinator says at 7:59 pm, February 20th, 2009

    Bruno: Kinda reminds me of that old joke - “Do you smoke after sex? “I don’t know I never looked”.

  11. President Beeblebrox says at 8:27 pm, February 20th, 2009

    Bruno: Get it right, yo. He’s a Trail Blazer, not a Trailblazer.

    Help me fill in the first new bullet point for Roland’s tomb…

    FIRST AFRICAN-AMERICAN IN ILLINOIS TO BECOME:

    • APPOINTED BY ROD “HAIR” BLAGOJEVICH AND RESIGN IN DISGRACE AFTER 45 DAYS (or something like that)
    • ILLINOIS ATTORNEY GENERAL
    • YADDA

  12. President Beeblebrox: First African American to become appointed US Senator by an impeached and indicted Governor and requested to resign by America’s first African-American President of the United States.

    That should use up all remaining bulletpoint space for the Zombie Senator

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