WASHINGTON, DC, 03:00 PM, TUE FEBRUARY 9 | Advertise on Wonkette | tips@wonkette.com | SUBMIT A TIP | RSS
« next »
THE THINGS PEOPLE SPEND MONEY ON

Food Styling Classes For a Hundred Bucks

If you’re not a poor like 78 percent of Wonkette readers, then you might be interested in taking Chef Danielle Turner’s new food styling classes. For $100, you can learn how to arrange and garnish your food in such a way that will turn your PB&J or Lean Cuisines or whatever into works of art.

While Chef Danielle — a food stylist for sexytime Giada De Laurentiis and evil Rachel Ray — can certainly help you make your food LOOK more appetizing, she won’t be able to help you make it TASTE more appetizing. You’ll have to sign up for her $400 cooking class for that. Sorry, poors!

Great Taste Personal Chef Service, (301) 352-3517.


9:45 AM on Mon February 23 2009
By Malaka Gharib
2196 Views

  1. PBJ’s? Lean Cuisine? Y’all are too fancy. I’m down to ramen noodles and thinking of making the move to the discount ramen that are 12 for a dollar.

  2. rmontcal says at 9:51 am, February 23rd, 2009

    “PB&J or Lean Cuisines” is funny but I think you should have gone with “Waffles and Grits or hobo beans”.

  3. Only if she wears that outfit for the class

  4. Serolf Divad says at 10:21 am, February 23rd, 2009

    For $100 I can eat for a month!

  5. I would like to learn how to make that fake display food you see at tourist restaurants, particularly in Japan. It could be a new career option for me. I suspect many restaurants and soup kitchens will want to have this so hobos don’t make off with real food they leave out.

  6. If you’re not a poor like 78 percent of Wonkette readers

    Why so low?

  7. Definitely wanting to spend my Stimulus check on this. Anything that will make roadkill pâté look like food is OK by moi.

    Can we haz list of Republican lobbyists taking the class?

  8. Mr Blifil says at 11:02 am, February 23rd, 2009

    Um…there’s something a bit off about the that turkey’s aroma…next time the chef should consider wearing more than a thong.

  9. DangerousLiberal says at 11:04 am, February 23rd, 2009

    So will I learn how to paint a turkey with Kitchen Bouquet or make Crisco look like ice cream, like real food stylists do? Ever notice the difference between what a Big Mac looks like in a photo, and what it looks like when the stoners slap it together? Yeah, me too, but I eat it anyway.

  10. The Can Opener Cookbook. One of the best investments I ever made.

  11. El Pinche says at 11:16 am, February 23rd, 2009

    I wish I had access to fancy foods and elegant dining. I’m stuck with $2.00 steaks at Funbags Club and Famous Food Bowls from KFC(or as Patton Oswald calls them: “failure pile in a sadness bowl”). Where’s my TAXCUTZ! ?

  12. Lascauxcaveman says at 11:17 am, February 23rd, 2009

    Whaddaymean, the sprig of parsley is the garnish for the meal?

    I thought it was the meal.

Leave a Reply